Hello, my friend.

Wow. Here I sit, many months since my last post. Even though I have been awake for about 90% of BBP's life, I have no idea where the time went. Okay, that's a lie. I know just where the time has gone. It has been spent in doctor's offices, pushing through crowds at DisneyLand, sitting in waiting rooms at doctor's offices, pacing the floors at 3am with sick children, snuggling in the Big Bed, exam rooms at doctor's offices, building forts with blankets, re-arranging the playroom multiple times to accomodate more toys, and on hold with pediatric nurses. Yet is still seems that it was weeks ago that we first introduced BP to her baby sister.

So, what else has happened in the last six-ish months? The economy tanked. We went to Six Flags, apnea monitor and all. Grandparents visited. Santa Claus dropped by. We made a last-minute road trip to DisneyLand. Daddypants went back to school. I started running again. The dogs ate an insane amount of tumbleweeds. All in all, life has happened. But, most recently, I have been trying not to stress about recent medical events. That's another story though.

Now that I have spent a good amount of time in various doctor's offices I have some advice to offer.

Don't be the parent that lets your child run wild in the waiting room. I know it sucks waiting for an hour, but that doesn't make it okay for your sick, snot-nosed child to poke my sick, snot-nosed baby in the eye. If your child is at melt-down point, that's fine, we've all been there, but it is NOT okay for your to be completely oblivious to the fact that your child is driving everyone crazy. Even a "I'm sorry little Johnny is wiping snot on your purse, we've been here a long time and he missed his nap" will help.

Toys. Always have toys. And crayons. If you smile and ask nicely, I'm betting the receptionist would be happy to give you a blank piece of paper from the printer. Especially if the alternative is hearing your toddler whine "I so ssaaaaaaaaad" a million times.

Snacks. Sometimes you just need a bribe.

Clean up after your child. Even better, have your child clean up. That stack of pamphlets that got knocked over? Pick it up. Otherwise someone else has to. And it will most likely be me. And after I've cleaned up after your child and s/he once again knocks them on the floor, you had better get your lazy ass up and not only clean up the mess but discipline your child for doing it on purpose.

Get off the f'ing phone. Seriously. No wonder why your child is halfway out the door. Interact with your most likely sick and miserable child. It will help with the whole knock-shit-on-the-floor thing.

Just a few things to keep in mind next time you are waiting.